Tuesday, February 28, 2017
Ooooh sometimes a girl just has to buy a pair of shoes.
I have never been able to wear high heels but I like the idea of me wearing a pair of high heels. Nature has colluded with my fear of heights and I cannot balance on anything higher than a centimeter off the ground. But I persist with the delusion that I will conquer this disability.
High heels are the epitome of femininity. I think they add a touch of sexuality to an otherwise ordinary outfit.
I have in the past invested in numerous pairs of these impractical objects and they have all been given away. But this morning I think I see THE pair that will make all others pale into insignificance.
They are black and have a heel like an icepick - cultural weapon perhaps? Good for stabbing muggers in dark alleys.
On the front of the toes are teeny little diamante in the shape of a butterfly. I am mesmerised by the shape and exotic opportunities these shoes possess. My friend Annie would call them "Fuck me" shoes.
Impulsively I buy them and walk to my car ... it's a Cinderella moment.
I imagine myself tottering towards a date in a restaurant - all eyes on me ... or my shoes to be precise.
At home I walk down the passage - hmmmm. I will need to practice. My sexy sashay looks more like someone lurching in the bar after a piss up.
It seems like my vertigo has not diminished. I look sadly at the slip in my purse - oh dear. A lot of money to waste on a fantasy.
Perhaps I can balance on them while using a pair of crutches .. Perhaps not!